the time is now

31 Oct

Last night I read a great blog post written by my friend, Lori. Lori wrote about What Really Matters ~go read it, I will wait for ya!!

Lori’s post really had me thinking and this post is the ramblings that have been going on in my head since.

I have been floundering.  I have not worked out in any way in the last two weeks. Not one workout since the AC (Half) Marathon.  I have been so stressed out that I screwed myself right into a tight/achy back. I tend to hold my stress in my left shoulder but this time the stress and pain all the way down to my butt.

How did I handle a bum back and a whole lot of stress?!?

Well, let’s just say I didn’t exercise and I didn’t eat fruits and veggies to ease the stress.  I am not going to go through the actual list because I don’t want to dwell in the past and things I cannot change. I want to move forward.

I need to move forward.

Tomorrow is November 1st and realizing this made me think about the past 11 months. I started January saying “2010 is the Year of Jen” and I have made great strides towards this but I never had a clear idea what I meant. I guess I still don’t. I have spent a lot of time this year focused on one goal or another: i.e. 3 months at LA Boxing, training and completing a half marathon. I have NOT just focused on ME. I have not made ME the priority.

I need to focus on ME!

Honestly, I did not realize I wasn’t focused on me. How did I train for a half marathon and not focus on myself?!? I am still asking myself that very question. I focus on challenges. I use challenges to dictate when I workout. I had a plan that was written out for my half and I didn’t follow that completely.  I took shortcuts, especially with the non-running aspect of the training plan.

What the heck do I do now?!?

I know I have a goal. I want to run more with less walking breaks. I want to run a 5K without needing to stop. BUT, I don’t want to be a slave to a training plan. So, once a gain, I am going to rewrite my goal. I am going to focus just on running more and walking less. I am going to focus on running for the sake of running. I am going to run for me…not a goal, not a race, not an event, nope, just for me!

I am going to end this year on a high note! I am going to end this year knowing I gave it my all for me! I really want to focus on ME and how I feel, I know I feel better when I run and workout but I need to do it for me, no other reason.

That is exactly what I am going to do!! I am going to focus on me and what makes me feel good! To do this I am going to track what I eat (not counting calories or points, but journaling what I am eating so I can see how it helps fuel me) and track what I do. I have a little notebook to keep with me at all times for my food and I will print out blank calendars for each month. I will make it a point to do something active every single day and write it down. I can’t wait to see how many boxes I can fill in each month.

I am entering unchartered territory here. I am going to be working out but I am doing it without a real training plan. But I am scared to just do this thing on my own for no other reason than I need to workout and exercise. I have goals but I those goals are just for me, not a big event or challenge. Why is doing this for myself is scary?

I will focus on variety and healthy habits because I know both will help me stay focused on me! My plan of attack is to be well rounded in my workouts and my eating. For my workouts I will rotate between running, yoga/pilates, strength training, and balance/core training.  I need and want to move my body every day! I need to eat to fuel my body and that means focusing on what is good for me and staying away from what is not so good. I know me, I will never give up the not-s0-good stuff but I need to limit it! I think by focusing on the good stuff, like fruits and veg, I naturally phase out the bad.

I have not stepped on the scale in a while and I don’t think I want to go back to weekly weigh-ins but I wonder if I should have monthly check ups?!? I guess that is a whole other post…because I don’t really care what the scale says but I feel like I should be more focused on the losing weight part of this journey….but in the same moment, I don’t really care about my actual weight… sorry, that makes no sense but it is part of the journey but I don’t know where it ranks.

One thing at a time and NOW is the time for ME to take care of ME and that does not include me stressing about what the stupid scale says.

Now is the time for ME to love ME!

How do you take care of yourself?!?

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11 Responses to “the time is now”

  1. Anonymous October 31, 2010 at 8:48 pm #

    OOHHH., how I loved this post! I can’t wait to hear your progress! I love the focus on YOU and how you are making yourself accountable to YOURSELF!!

    As for me…I have come to really LOVE exercising! and it doesn’t matter what kind. and when I DON’T exercise I am crabby and grumpy and down in the dumps for no apparent reason! Just one more reason do move my body every.single.day!

    • jeninRL October 31, 2010 at 11:29 pm #

      I love exercise when I am exercising. I still fight myself with doing it, especially after a few days off. I am thinking the more days I do something the more I am likely to keep doing it! I know part of my crankiness would go away if I was exercising.

      Thanks for the reminder.

  2. Jules - Big Girl Bombshell October 31, 2010 at 11:10 pm #

    Lori’s post did the same the same for me…my post tomorrow started from that idea… great post… what measurement do you want to use…that is the answer since this is for you..

    I do I take care of myself….one day at a time and remembering my priorities and the WHY of my journey

    • jeninRL October 31, 2010 at 11:31 pm #

      That’s the thing, I just don’t know how I want to measure. I am not good at taking the measurements but maybe the scale and a picture monthly…that is what I am thinking…..but all will be combined with how my jeans feel…..oooh maybe pic of those jeans.

      That is a great idea, one day at a time and constant thought about priorities and the WHYs! Thanks!

  3. MizFit08 November 1, 2010 at 9:53 am #

    LOVE lori.
    LOVED that post as well.

    and ADORE YOU.

  4. AKA Freak4Fitness November 1, 2010 at 11:32 am #

    Writing down your goals is always the best start. Good for you. If you have to, take small steps, but just keep focusing on the goals, and of course yourself!

  5. DareToBecome November 1, 2010 at 1:39 pm #

    The biggest thing I love about you Jen is that you are yourself. You don’t over-analyze everything and celebrate all the wonderful little things that happen along the way. People weigh their food, count every calorie, weigh themselves hourly, daily, weekly, etc to the point where I think it makes them a little (or a lot) OCD. I’m not saying they are wrong, but all that distraction away from living their real life makes me sad. So a person eats a candy bar – BFD! Move on, move on, move on. And – YOU are constantly moving on and embracing yourself. With you I know I can just be real because you are just as busy being real yourself. Love you.

  6. Loser For Life November 1, 2010 at 5:39 pm #

    You need to focus on taking care of you, Jen! Especially in stressful times. It’s the hardest to do, but so necessary!

    I think you will find journaling to be a good tool in keeping you on track. It really worked wonders for me! I don’t think you need of follow any specific plan for exercise or diet; just make good choices. They all add up! And exercise especially doesn’t need a training plan. It just needs to happen as a lifestyle. You can do it, girlie!

    And before you know it, I’ll be back in Brig running with you and splitting everything bagels! LOL!

  7. KCLAnderson (Karen) November 1, 2010 at 7:38 pm #

    The only thing I measure is my waist. For me it’s a good indicator. But I only do it when the spirit moves me. As for how I take care of myself? My #1 way to take care of myself is something I recently wrote about in my blog: I practice self acceptance.

    I stand in front of the mirror, but with my back turned to it. I think of something that makes me feel all googly inside…like my husband, my stepdaughter’s unborn baby, my kitties (those are mine, yours might be different). I get that feeling going until I can actually feel it physically. I usually feel it in my chest/heart area. Then I turn around and look at myself in the mirror. I soften my eyes and take some slow, deep breaths. I unlock my shoulders. And then I direct the googly feeling to myself in the mirror and inwardly at the same time.

  8. Nadine November 3, 2010 at 9:47 am #

    Honestly, I don’t feel ‘right’ when I go too long without exercising – kickboxing, running, spin, whatever – I’m a cardio girl. I need to get better at strength training routinely. I think that what you’ve arrived at is that you needed to stop and realize that even though everyone elses plans look fun and challenging, it was time for you to decide what YOU wanted to do. I’ve told you before, and I’ll say it again. There is no shame in walking breaks during a run. Jeff Galloway has built a whole career on it, and really, the goal is to remain injury free. In my opinion, it doesn’t make someone a ‘better’ runner because they never take a walking break. One of the reasons I love running is because the only one I’m REALLY competing against is myself. I’ve never been into competitive sports, ever. I run with other girls and I enter races, but really, all I want to do is improve myself, my pace or my distance. It is ok to focus on one part of the journey at a time. The rest of it will fall into place my friend! Be proud of what you have accomplished so far, and also of your ability to look within and figure out what is next. Can’t wait to watch it happen!

  9. Wifey November 4, 2010 at 10:52 pm #

    Yay YOU! You have to love “Me”! I’m so sure you will end this year with a bang and I look forward to watching you shine!

    Winks & Smiles,
    Wifey

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