tears are good

5 Apr

The last few posts have been of an emotional nature.

I have always kept it pretty darn real around her, but I am one of those people who like to see the brighter, happier side of everything.  The last few weeks have just plainly been rough!

I feel like I was hit by the mac daddy of all emotional 18-wheelers.

I really believed, or let myself believe, that I was totally over all the bull shit with my parents, especially my step-mother.  I love my sister to pieces and so fortunate that despite not having grown up together and having different mothers, we are so close.  High stress family functions, like weddings, are bound to bring up all those buried feelings. I would so rather leave those feelings buried.

And then my daughter comes home needing DNA information for school. She is one tough cookie, that kid of mine!!

And then there was the PMS train ride.

And the Saturday came and my daughter went to my mother’s for the day and my husband went to work.

I had the house to myself and I watched ever sappy movie that helps me cry. I cried and slept most of the weekend away.  I never knew I could be so tired when all I did was watch movies and cry.

I cried.

I slept.

I cried more.

I slept more.

I felt better.

I really felt better.

By Sunday night, I was planning my menu and week’s workouts. I was packing my “gym” bag.

Planning is my new key to sanity. Seriously, I am scatterbrained on a good day but you do NOT want to see me when I can’t find my keys….oh shit, I have to go look for my house keys before Big Man kicks my a$$.  When I start planning and making reasonable plans, that’s when I know I am feeling better.

I am truly working on being gentle with myself while I am working through emotions and losing weight and becoming a runner. I tried telling myself emotions had nothing to do with any of this healthy living stuff.

I was proven wrong…

by my own tears!!

I came out on the other side and I feel stronger and ready to move forward.

Tears are good.

Big Man HATES when I cry – he is awesome and will just hug me while I cry but he hates being helpless.  I have learned that tears are good! Tears are cleansing! Tears are for wiping the slate clean.

Tears are good, but I am ready to move on!

Monday I felt READY!

I had cried and rested and planned.

I was ready!

I DID IT!

I turned my tears into good. I set my mind to something (my new weekly workout plan) and I did it!

Yesterday, I set my mind to workout with the KettleBells and I did.

Yesterday, I set out to run a mile and I did.

Today, I am ready for whatever life throws at me….which is going to be a HUGE thunder and rain storm…..but I will do right for me! I will take care of me!

 

What will you do today to take care of you?

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8 Responses to “tears are good”

  1. armstrongadventures April 5, 2011 at 6:55 am #

    I decided to schedule a massage! I’m battling tight sore muscles all around (both a result of working out AND stress!) — I too believe that tears have a place in cleansing things!

  2. Brooke April 5, 2011 at 8:49 am #

    crying is exhausting work! glad it helped. {{{jen}}} and planning kicks booty!

  3. KCLAnderson (Karen) April 5, 2011 at 10:44 am #

    Ah yes…crying is freaking fantastic! Did you know that it actually helps balance chemicals in your brain?? I don’t know why or how our culture became so uncomfortable with tears but I am here to say that crying is one of the best ways to stay healthy. 🙂

  4. Tara April 5, 2011 at 12:59 pm #

    So freakin proud of you Jen. This is some good stuff happening for you. Knowing you can feel these emotions AND still move forward is powerful!

  5. Terri (@teetee_71) April 5, 2011 at 1:10 pm #

    I’m glad you had that day to cleanse. We all need those once in awhile. You are growing and learning more about yourself everyday. I’m so proud of you! xoxo

  6. Kyra April 5, 2011 at 4:23 pm #

    Aw, Honey, I’m sending hugs to you. I’ve been doing a lot of this myself these last few days…

  7. Kerri O April 6, 2011 at 2:36 pm #

    So awesome. I know, like, in my head that crying is good…but I spent most of my life trying to be tough, so letting myself cry is still hard. Proud of you.

  8. @LastMinuteMandy April 7, 2011 at 12:38 am #

    Oh, love! I just read through your posts….big huge hugs for you and for Q! And here I am, being “moody” and there you are, uplifting me…when I could do go to give you more love back. You are one amazing lady, you know that?

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